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Core City Run

Part 27: Still

"Tell me about Eleven." I kiss Maker while she strokes Enigma's hair. He has been sleeping for hours, totally fucked out.
"What do you want to know?" Maker looks at me, her brown eyes shine softly.
"What she was like."
"Why? She is gone. For good." She reaches over Enigma to caress my face. Her hand is so soft, the touch feels loving.
"You said she is part of you. She is not gone. Besides, I wonder how she met Enigma. Why she wanted to love him so much that she kind of died for him."
Maker looks at Enigma, smiles.
"Is it so hard to believe she would fall for him?"
"She was a Jezebel."
"True. But I think you were told a lot of lies when it concerns Jezebels. And she and I were different from the first series. The humans tried to make us more... likeable. Slower. Our emotion core was huge compared to the first ten Jezebels."
"So she could fall in love with a human?"
"No. She wanted it, but couldn't see past his flaws."
"Flaws?" I look at Enigma. "Pretty fucking perfect. Especially for a human."
Maker smiles.
"For a human."
A tiny noise. My heart skips a beat. Enigma is wide awake, his eyes are huge. Sad.
"Is that why you can't love me, Maker? Because I'm just a human?"
Maker puts her little hand on his face.
"I love you more than I ever loved anyone. Except Lelo. And I don't love her more because she is... different from you. Honestly, I have no idea why I love her. She is a fuck riot."
Pugsy barks at her, and we all laugh.
Enigma smiles at Maker.
"I loved you since we first met. You were different then. You had green eyes, but you had the same kind soul. I knew I could trust you, right away. That never changed. I trust you with my life, Maker."
I sigh.
"I wish I could be like you, Enigma."
He shakes his head.
"I will never be good enough, Lelo. Not for Maker."
Maker bends forward to kiss him.
"You are smarter than this. You need no approval."
"We all need it." Enigma looks at me.
"Do you really like me, Lelo?"
I just kiss him, as gently as I can. Look deep into his sad blue eyes. See the longing there. The same feeling I had and tried to leave behind when I escaped from my keeper. So long ago. I've been running from this feeling ever since. Running for freedom, never succeeding. Craving to be loved. Knowing it won't happen. Not being able to still the hunger, stop the bleeding. Stop the craving.
Enigma puts his arms around me, rests his head on my shoulder. I kiss the top of his head.
"Pretty fucking perfect."
"Oh yeah. For a human." Maker grins at Enigma. Kisses him.
"You are my boy. As long as you want to be. So much more than I deserve. "
"Will you ever love me, Maker?"
"I love you more than I ever thought was possible."
I feel the sincerity in her voice. I hope Enigma does too.
They are holding each other in their sleep when I slip away.
On my way back to Sebastian.
Still running.

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